Stepmom’s love can be great too!

Posted on Posted in Relations and Family, Stories & Poetry

[This is a TRUE story, not mine, but of a very close friend of mine]

Relationships

It was a beautiful day, life seemed to be so happy in the arms of mom and dad. I was barely 12 then, but life was such a joy, with the only motto of play with dad and get delicious meals by mom. It was complete fun getting to learn the practical world which mom taught to we 3 siblings, me being the oldest. We used to quickly get our family time & run for short weekends as a picnic & enjoy in the lap of nature and play with mom and dad. Life was smooth, really pleasant.

Something scary was upcoming!

The next morning was a foggy day, with lots of rains. The beginning of the day was very dull and I just wanted to eat pakora’s with tea for the breakfast. And as usual, Dear mom have always known what my heart wanted. Having the delicious breakfast that Sunday morning made me relax in my bed again to enjoy the outside rains. [Those were the days when schools were closed due to excessive rains]. But, why will mom want to stay inside? She had her daily routine and despite rains, she went visit the temple and get veggies.

From the balcony I could hear her asking the auto-wallah right in the colony to drop her off & there she went in few minutes for her chores. I was deep in the blanket enjoying the view from my window and my little 2 siblings were in another closet. Dad was off course completing his week’s sleep on the Sunday! 30-40-50minutes of her gone, it was getting late than the normal days, but I knew rains could cause a hell delay. All I could hear was a loud crash just in the lane near to our flat. Thinking it as a normal skid on the rainy terrain, I actually didn’t get out of my bed, until I saw people rushing towards our society.

It was terrible!

Dad rushed towards the balcony and went hurriedly down the stairs to find that some people were still trying to nab that carriage van while some were trying to pull away a body that seemed life-less..Yes, lifeless, it was my MOM, who got crushed in the accident that rainy day! The carriage van guy was not drunk, it was the heavy foggy weather with zero visibility which took her away from us, far..very far!

Life became traumatised without “Her”. I yearned for Mom’s love despite dad trying to give us all the love & care. But I could also sense a deep emptiness in HIS life. Who did he speak his heart out to? His only motto became “we three growing kids”. It pained to not see “HER” cooking yummy dishes, it hurt to not see HER caressing us anymore. The wound of missing her was not ready to heal even after a year passed, coz she was someone who was the most beloved person for all of us. Her tenderness, charisma, the magic of her words, sparkling eyes, affection all had gone with her to heaven that fateful day. But for all of us, it seemed that the earth had stopped its rotation, life was not willing to move ahead, it actually took a big pause.

A decision was being made!

Suddenly, we came to know that dad had agreed to “Re-marry” to bring back mom’s love & care for us. But NO, how could someone replace our MOM? Step-MOM, well it was a ruthless picture framed in our young minds. That atrocious figure, who would take our dad away from us. But somehow these imaginations just continued between we 3 siblings, and life went all the more into dreariness. Dad used to counsel us every day with so much of love & responsibility, but it did not help us more than saying a YES to him and keeping a heavy heart to ourselves.

With a sobbing heart, that day we stood in front of our Dear MOM’s frame the full day speaking and crying out our souls to her. Me, being the eldest, had to take the lead and decided “NOT” to join the small evening where the marriage took place, to get a new mama for us. It was not vital, we could have never forgotten HER love, there was a huge gap which none could replace.

New life began!

The next day, our Step mom stepped in the house. We 3 siblings, decided not to come out of our rooms, we didn’t even wanted to see her glimpse. The optimistic glimmer coming from the “flowered frame” was enough for us to lead the life. As days passed “She” started conversing with us, tried to initiate chats, tried to take us for some outings. She even tried to cook really delicious meals (which we never appreciated) for us of our choices. Somehow that hurdle was not getting a NOC certification. Our heart beats were not going to beat for her that easily.

Dad continued his counselling to us and new mom tried persuading us by everything she could do. It continued till a year, when we came to know that we were to welcome another baby in the house. No, we were not ready, our fears would touch the reality very soon. Who would love us then? Why will we be wanted by dad & new mom then? What will happen to our dreams & desires? Yes, we were getting really selfish but we needed an undivided love for the huge void which was created. We really needed a motherly figure just to us, to speak our hearts out. But this instance left us in a state of shock & we three were heartbroken once again. We were trying to reach normalcy with the new mom, but the road block hit us back again.

Life is challenging!

Sensing something wrong, our new-mom took us for a beach walk that day. We sat, ate some yummy delicacies prepared by her for us, played for some time. As the waves began to get high, she asked us to speak our mind & heart. She wanted to know the reason of our sorrowful attitudes.

I really dunno what the trigger was that day. A very heavy heart full of melancholy and dejection, spoke it all out with tears not stopping to drip down. That day, she didn’t ask me to stop those tears and I continued speaking full of emotions. Sobbing along with us, she hugged us tightly and said “I loved you all kids & will love you forever. There shall be no barrier between us. None of you will ever lose a mom’s love again, I promise”. We really couldn’t understand much except acknowledging that she will love & care for us. My heart was little light but the jitters of another sibling was intact until we got to know the other day that “She had aborted the baby”. She got herself operated to never conceive in her life, stating that we 3 kid were hers and she did not wanted any other child to stand as a fence.

Our lives were upside down!

That day we realized a true moms love once again. Can a mom abort her very own kid for the sake of step children? No, we were not step, rather her own children, whom she has loved so much. That was the day of realization, a day when her love won! She really filled our lives once again with all the care & tenderness we missed. It has been more than 30years of her togetherness with us.

She is world to us!

Stepmoms Love

And all I can say for her is that – “She is the dearest Mom who has loved all so much. Never thinking of her self interests, rather always planning to give the family & friends all what she can. She is the one who has brought us big & mature enough to handle this world. She has married us all 3 kids so graciously and has hugged our kids in a manner even we could not. Indeed, she was a perfect partner for our Dad, who could re-live his life with peace & happiness”. 

All I can do is thank God for giving us a gracious Mom. I wish to come out of her womb for all the life I have to come again in this world.

And, all I want to say from my life is, Step moms in the stories are really only in stories. It all depends on what a person is from the core of heart. We couldn’t accept her for one long year, every single day passed with she struggling to get our love. I saw so many days when she sat alone staring at stars & sometimes I did see tears rolling down her eyes. I understood later, she longed for the love of we three kids.

This life is beautiful, give love, spread love. Understanding & loving people is the best thing I took from her for life.

77 thoughts on “Stepmom’s love can be great too!

  1. I don’t have a stepmom, so I don’t know what that’s like. If I had one, I’d treat her with respect and hope that love would eventually follow.

  2. I’m so sorry you lost your birth mom at such a young age:( Your stepmom sounds like a good and loving woman.

  3. Never experienced these complex emotions but after all love comes from within the heart and not based on who gave birth! Lucky are those who are blessed with kind and loving step moms..

  4. My mom passed away when I was young, so reading this was heartbreaking. I understand how hard it is to welcome a step-mom into the family. I’m so glad it turned out okay and they had someone else to love them.

  5. This post brought me to tears. I’m so sorry you lost your mom at such a young age. I couldn’t imagine how much pain you’ve been through. I’m glad to know that your stepmom is giving you the love and care that you’ve been missing! I wish you continued happiness in your life!

    Belle | One Awesome Momma

    1. Hey yes this is indeed a painful story, though not mine but a friend of mine, which I have seen so closely! I too wish that she gets all the happiness in her life!

  6. Oh wow, I teared up reading this! I can’t even imagine that pain. But I’m glad that your Stepmom is loving and kind and that in turn you are able to be that way with her now.

  7. Great read. I never had to deal with a step parent, but my kids might and I will make sure they always respectful to the step parent. It can be hard and painful to loose a parent. Glad your stepmom was so caring to you.

  8. Beautiful story of love and healing. My husband adopted my son when we were married. He has been the only “daddy” my son has ever known. Thank you for sharing this!

  9. I agree there are. many different types of love, I believe family is family. “step” family members have so much love to give as well it’s just icing in the cake if you ask me!

  10. I guess it is not usual for everyone to have a step mom yet the respect and love can be won once she had also let us see how she respects you and your siblings. A mutual relationship as well.

  11. What a touching story i must say, to lose your mom at such a young age can be so so painful but getting a stepmom that has such wonderful heart is the greatest gift.

  12. Love is love is love 🙂 It doesn’t matter where it comes from. This piece was so beautifully written. I can feel the passion behind it. Can’t wait to read more!

  13. Some emotions there, life can be cruel at times but there has to be openness about what life offers to us. With this story as well, welcoming new people at difficult juncture and to replace someone so special is difficult from both sides. Let’s be nice and welcoming.

  14. Very touchy and beautifully written.. I wish no child ever has to bear a mother’s loss and if unfortunately someone does.. I hope someone as loving can become part of their life.. without mothers any life is incomplete

  15. Hi, I personally can’t relate to this personal post from your friend. I know others who have found being a step parent tough, love is all that counts at the end of the day.

  16. Wow this is amazing, I’m dam happy for you, I’ve a stepmother and my mum is no more, but the opposite of your story is what we get, she’s doing everything possible not to see us happy. I just wish i can have mum back even for a few minutes

  17. I have a stepdad and he’s is my dad to me and others. I respect him and treat him as such. That we don’t share a blood bond, doesn’t make our bond any less. Stepparents are often rocks in our lives as much as birth parents. ?

  18. This is such a thoughtful and positive read. Great to hear such a good story about step parents, which isn’t the evil trope.

  19. This is so touching! I hope you and your family are doing really well now. It is difficult to accept the loss of a loved one initially but it gets easier. Much easier.

  20. Its horrible that step-moms have this stigma of being nasty and cruel and I suppose a lot of this is down to books and films that are made that portray stem moms to be like that! I have an aunt who has been a step mom to my cousin since she was 4 years old. She has been a better mother to her than her own birth mom. This is evidence enough that it is all down to the women and how they wish to treat the child.

    http://www.nmdiaries.com

  21. This made me so emotional and I actually shed a tear 🙁

    There’s this bad stigma around step-parents and most of the children don’t really give the chance to them just because of that 🙁

  22. It must have been so hard losing your mom so young and in such a sudden and tragic accident. You are so blessed to have had two such wonderful moms in your life.

  23. I am sorry for the terrible experience but I am glad that you can reflect on it so openly and use your hardships for good. Thank you for sharing!

  24. What a sacrifice your friend’s stepmom gave to prove her love. Kudos to her and your friend is lucky to have love of such a great and loving lady. This unknown bond is example of true love.

  25. I’m sorry you lost your mother at such a young age. I have both of my parents so can’t imagine that but they are seperated so I’ve went though a few possible step mothers in my life. .

  26. This was such an emotional post to read. I do not have a step-mom so I guess I am not in much of a position to judge. I know, sometimes stories and movies can really make us believe things that rent true in real life. Thanks for sharing you story.

  27. That must have been a terribly difficult time for you, thanks for sharing! My dad is getting ready to re-marry now, and since I’m older, I understand a bit better, but it’s definitely a transition.

  28. It is such an emotional read and I actually read all the comments too…I can only say one thing that sometimes relationships are complicated but if it is nurtured with love,understanding and communication, it becomes a beautiful reality. I cannot even imagine the pain you went through but I am glad that now you are happy and content.

    1. Yo wrote it so truly that relations can be nurtured with love and understanding. This is what happened here too and the bond is so beautiful now. It needs time and patience. Thanks for the read:)

  29. What a great article . Thank you for sharing the very personal view of someone life . Its very touching and I can imagine how hard to accept someone who enter and replace our birth mom side especially when we were young .

  30. Reading this gave me goosies. What an amazing story. I wish you wouldn’t have experienced that pain though. It’s hard when we lose what we think is the only mum we could have ever had. Great read.

  31. My mom died when I was thirteen. Within a couple of years, my father too remarried. My brother and I too weren’t very happy about it and, looking back, weren’t very kind. It never stopped her though, she kept trying and trying. Now, I see things far differently and am so very thankful she came into our lives (and didn’t give up on us). She and my father just celebrated their 32nd wedding anniversary. x

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