How To Help Your Child Make Friends Easily In School?
Ever wondered how our life would be without our friends?
Dull. Pale. Meaningless. Fruitless.
Exactly! As adults, if we feel how doomed our life would be, then imagine how essential friends must be for the children. So it is important to help your child make friends from a very early stage.
“What is a friend? I will tell you…it is someone with whom you dare to be yourself.” – Frank Crane
This quote quite captured my attention and I will tell you why.
The younger kids are fascinated by gadgets and barely raise their heads from it. The various skills needed to be developed at that age is often prevented by those gadgets. I am not against it, mind you. At the same time, I am not even in favor of its incessant use. Between 3 – 7 years children should be exposed to a lot of physical activities which will help them to mingle with other kids. It is not cliché to take our babies to playground, garden, parks or any recreational place per se. Let them breathe that fresh air, play in the soil, dirty their feet and hands. It is absolutely fine, in fact, it should be encouraged.
The friendships created at this tender age last long too and believe me when I say this. I, too, was an introvert when I was young and I had only one friend then. And we are friends till date for 19 years. Friends are vital. It’s difficult to imagine a life without their presence. For the children to not miss out on these friendships, they can sign up for art club, book club, chess or any sports activity club, camps, scout, summer activities, band, etc.
Below are some tips that can help your child make friends and enjoy their childhood wholeheartedly:
Be An Emotion Coach to Help Your Child Make Friends
Children whose negative emotions are usually trivialized (“You’re just being silly”) or punished (“Go to your room and cool off”) tend to have more trouble with self-control and dealing with problems. Discussing your minor problems with your child and sharing how you found solutions to them will equip them to resolve their issues better and regulate their emotions.
Practice Authoritative (Not Authoritarian) Parenting
Authoritative parenting is characterized by high levels of control in which parents set limits and demand maturity from their kids. But unlike authoritarian parents, authoritative parents communicate with warmth and attempt to shape their child’s behavior through rational discussion and explanation of the reasons for the set rules. This will teach them to be rational and receptive when communicating with their peers.
Teach kids how to converse in a Polite Way
The earliest lesson a child receives about communication happens at home, and it makes a huge difference to his/her personality. As parents, we should set examples of polite behavior and pleasant disposition. Polite behavior will help your child make friends faster.
Avoid comparison and competitiveness- For young kids who are struggling to make friends, competitive games and other situations that can provoke conflict or discourage cooperation should be avoided.
Monitor Kids’ Social Life
Studies in a variety of cultures suggest that children are better off when their parents monitor their social activities. This, however, doesn’t mean hovering over the kids or interfering in every peer interaction. But it does mean supervising their safety and the company they keep.
These steps will enhance their communication and social skills. When your child begins to go to school, invite his/her classmates to home. As a parent, you too could become friends with other child’s mother/father. This will serve as a role model for him/her to build friendships. Take your friend’s child/children to movies along with your child, indulge them in a scoop of ice cream or that bucket of popcorn. If your child is an introvert, help your child to make friends.
A few steps that can help establish strong friendships are as follows:
Introduce Yourself
Always start by greeting “Hello” and introduce yourself. Then ask the person’s name.
Be Appreciative
Teach your child to appreciate the little things in life. Let them complement the other child’s things and interests. This will create appreciation and compassion for each other and create strong bonds.
Keep In Touch
When your child comes home and tells you about their new friends, note down the contact numbers or any other details. Help your child to contact them and discourse.
Be A Good Listener
Often in friendships, one often need not be a good storyteller but must be an effective listener. Listen to your child and in turn, make them understand the importance of listening when interacting with their peers. Being bossy and always being the one to talk will only cause one to drift away from other children.
Plan Activities Together
The best way to know each other and build friendships is to do activities together, be it studying, playing a sport or game or reading. Collaborating and engaging over an activity improves communication and promotes bonding.
Let us encourage our children to explore themselves and the world around them. Support and advise them as they take a plunge in building everlasting friendships with other little ones.
[Thank you Ms. Sakina Solanki, who is a Grade 2 Homeroom Teacher at JBCN International School, Parel for this insightful post]
Thats a very informative and helpful post for all the parents for their kids. I will share this post to my friends with kids.
Lovely post Jhilmil. It is very important for parents to let the kids understand the importance of friendship and more than that important of good friendship.
It’s really important that we teach them to make friends as they will be your trustworthy and lifelong…your tips are great
Yes actually it is a crucial step in the direction of right parenting that the kid has some good friends. Especially in today’s era where there are so many fake associations around.
These are some wonderful tips. I agree that helping kids understand the importance of being polite and a simple hello goes a long way.
Thanks dear. I am very much sure that these tips are very helpful for making new friends. I must say this is really very good post.
Thanks for the helpful tips. I agree that its very important to be a good listener & we have to teach same to our kids.
Hi Jhilmil,
It is so important for today’s generation to spend time outside their houses. Nature is the best of teachers. We should encourage our kids to go out and play with their age kids around. That will teach them bonding and team work. It will help them develop their mind and body in a healthy way.
I like the idea of teaching kids to speak politely. This one tip will help them to socialize in the long run!
This post is important because in gadget age, it’s easy to make Virtual friends but real friends is what we need in the long run.
This is a very helpful topic for parents as sometimes kids do need help when they are introvert or there are other reasons.
These are all good tips and easy to implement as well. I will keep them in mind now that my son has begun his school journey.
Agree that parents should help kids in making friends and these tips of being polite and become a good listener will improve their personality
I wish you have post this about 18 years ago and my parents have read this useful post !
This is a beautiful post, often kids dont realize the importance of friendship at early age and fail to make good friends. This is a wonderful writeup. Thanks for sharing,
Nice post with useful tips.
My son is bit shy and introvert .
I encouraged him to go and play with boys in neighborhood ,now they are good friends ?
You have touched a very important topic here. I see my daughter struggling to open up and really wonder how can I help her to make friends.
This post is really infrmative …we usually neglect the the social life of kids because of which are kids show anger or they brcme anti social
Social interaction and making friends is so necessary for the healthy development of kids. So sad that nowadays kids spend so much with gadgets and need to be prodded to go outdoors.
Yes, I feel lot of physical activities outside the home boundaries expose your child socially, more effectively than anything else. A close monitoring is recommended though.
Utpal Khot
Such a insightful information on parenting, it always great to understand child and break the bound
I do agree with you dear and am glad to write this, we must teach and aid our kids break ice with new friends
Friendships are important not just for social development but overall development as well. Great tips here
Kids can have a really difficult time making friends… Like I had in my childhood… Your tips are really good… Will share this with my aunt who has young kids!
It is necessary to keep an eye on kids and let them get together and make new friends around.
Friendships are a source of learning for children too and to form great, healthy ones is a luck! Your recommendations are great, any parent would be benefited from these
These are some amazing tips to get child friendly with school mates. Parents play a very important role in making the child feel comfortable in and around others.
Very well thought out points …this is a helpful article, for kids and also for others. Making friends is such an essential skill…a fun skill 🙂
Since my school days, what I have done is, I have made so many friends and they are my true friends, I love them so much. The same thing I have seen in Mickey also. He also loves making friends and he starts talking with everyone, So insightful post Jhilmil, infact as a parents we should encourage them to make friends in school.
That’s such an insightful post Jhilmil. My son would be starting school soon and these tips would be really helpful.
Really…very helpful and informative post for all the parents…Must share it with my friends..
Nice and informative article. Its helpful to all parents
Best blog Jhilmil, This very important to understand every parent.
Thanks for sharing this. Keep posted. Happy to read this blog.
This is a great article for parents. Every parent should read this article.