Enabling kids to manage emotions effectively
Don’t you wish to be a child once again? As I see kids around me, I take a peek back into my childhood days. Ah, I so much wish to be a child again. No responsibilities, no tasks, no worries. Wait. Did we read no worries? But that’s what we would think. Look at kids growing in this century and you’ll see that kids have their own set of anxieties and stress too. They aren’t worry free at all. Their worries revolve around school, self-image, relations (with friends), bullying, and much more.
Even our lives are full of stress and many times, I see myself passing that stress to my child unknowingly. Quite an injustice! We need to come to terms with ourselves first, only then can we help our kids become mentally and emotionally strong, ready to face life head-on! There are a few ways to achieve this.
1. Resilience :
It’s the inner mental strength that helps kids confront challenges of early life. The fortitude to bounce back from setbacks, to keep going while facing all odds and to reach their highest potential needs to set in. To make them resilient, there are a few things to keep in mind.
- Create challenging situations: It helps kids learn the way to deal with something “tough”. As a parent, create situations, let your children earn 10% of their pocket money on their own. Try making your kid raise funds for some charity from your neighbours. It could make them emotional or defiant. But when they surpass the challenge, they’ll be confident and headstrong.
- It’s okay to ask for help: Sometimes overconfidence engulfs kids and when they fail, they shatter. They find they are not the superheroes they see on screen who save everyone. Thus, they need to know when to ask for help and that doing so is absolutely okay.
- Shower them with loads of encouragement: Praising is important but not on every task done by kids. It is better to encourage them for their efforts to help them keep going.
- Experience failure: If your child falls on the playground, keep an eye, but don’t rush to lift and pamper. Your child will get up and start playing again. Set them lose, they are “learning” and carving their life, basis their mistakes and experiences. We need to help them face their fears and cheer them for every step they take to overcome it.
- Say no to perfectionism: I’ve seen mommy’s around me, putting in efforts on their child’s behalf for competitions and picking up the trophy. Instead, the “effort” your child had put in should matter more. Applaud those small steps.
- Problem solving: It is not at all necessary to poke in your parental nose and solve all their riddles. If kids ask for help, do support them with the approach, instead of giving them the complete solution. Give them a stand to make choices and value their decisions. Their decisions could initially be wrong, allow them to experience and give them a chance to correct.
- Let them be uncomfortable at times: Usually kids start avoiding situations where they feel uncomfortable. We need to push kids out of their comfort zones, praise their efforts and convey that as parents, you care more about their willingness to try rather than what they achieve.
2. Building Self Esteem :
If kids believe in themselves, you can see them accomplish amazing heights. Children with high self–esteem turn out to be competent, loved, happy and productive individuals.
- Give them choices and don’t do everything for them
- Assign them age-appropriate household chores and tasks and praise them when they accomplish.
- Never ever call them names, label them or use sarcasm to make your point.
3. Nutrition :
There are ample studies to prove that nutrition plays a pivotal role in the intellect and behavior of growing kids. Vitamins, minerals, and fatty acids like Omega-3 (DHA) are important in the development of the emotional system and brain. Studies have proved that the lack of the right nutrition has a direct relation to autism, withdrawal symptoms, anxieties, and low stamina in growing kids. Since our internal formation of DHA is quite low, we need to consume it through various foods and supplements.
4. Build a Strong Character :
Instill and reinforce values such as honesty, compassion, love, gratitude, rather than always asking them to win. Encourage them to stick to their morally correct stand even when others disapprove of it. This way they won’t fall prey to all misleading bait in their lives.
- Ask them to say no to bullying and face the one bullying with opinions.
- Ask kids to write down all the things they are grateful for.
- Why not, thank God daily for the blessings he has showered upon, so that even on a bad day, they will have something to be thankful for.
- Give a small encouraging note or a card if your child goes out of the way to show gratitude.
As parents, we need to work on their thoughts and emotions as it is said that thoughts create beliefs and beliefs form attitude!
5. Free Play :
We all know how much kids love their play. But did you ever wonder how much time your child is getting for free play?
I saw my preschooler playing “Animal Shelter Play” with his friends. While few became family members, 2-3 opted to become animals, rather than talking animals. They took to the emotions of an animal, love, and care, which are our responsibilities as humans. These kids were not just passing the message, but they were building up their emotional skills. They were attaining compassion by this play.
Free play experiences help kids understand their emotions and other feelings. As kids work towards no particular goal, their imagination and problem solving abilities build up.
As you engage with your kids more, you’ll realize that emotional development is more of a journey than a destination. You have to consciously put in a bit of an effort every day to gauge where your child stands. Every once in a while, I tend to look back at my parenting experience so far and find moments that were crucial to the development of my child. You can also try these simple ways to help your child become emotionally resilient and strong.
Stay Happy and Emotionally Strong!
Love,
As the saying goes, the child is the father of the Man. The emotional and psychological traits get rooted early on and hence it is so necessary to provide the right environment to growing kids.
Thank you for writing this lovely post. You’re absolutely right about the fact that children and their emotional state needs to ne nurtured properly without overpowering them.
Loved reading the blog and yes I totally agree that it’s very important that kids should know to show their emotions from a very small age, thank you for sharing this bit, will definitely share the same with my contacts too
I think this fear of failure and the striving for perfection is what drives us to into anxiety ,depression and insecurity.Loved this post … we all fall , the strength lies in getting up again.
These are some great tips to built a strong character for child. It’s very important to be strong but compationate, and to stand for just cause.
Love the post and yes I am totally in it with you here. With too much social and peer pressure, even we at times lose out on emotions front, it better we build a strong foundation for our kids
true, right foundation is very important
Agreed with you. Even I ask him, do not say the word NO. Its a negative word and I use to tell him that we can do anything. We have to try atleast. I also do appreciate him for his work and I have planned already that when he will grow up I will ask him to manage his own pocket money. Because I did the same thing. And the tips you have mentioned under point 4, really good. I will follow. Enfagrow is good health drink and I will try this for sure.
Thanks Sayeri, raising kids is not easy and we as parents need to be sure of the right upbringing:)
Some kids are way too emotional while some are really not. Being emotional is a good thing as it brings out the sensitive side of one’s character. But it should be directional.
These are wonderful tips on how to help the child develop good emotional health and understanding. I find people don’t take the time to help a child to internalise which they should because self awareness is so important
Rightly said, self awareness is an important aspect which needs to be built n when kids are growing.
Its really important to take care to nurture a kid’s emotional development from the very beginning. We as parents are the best guide in the process.
Truly a great post covering very important topics to manage kids emotions. Experiencing failure and problem solving skills must be thought from the beginning.Very informative write-up.
True, kids these days need to be resilient and have a logical bent of mind!
Very beautifully written and you have discussed the strong points which all the parents should be aware of. Thank for sharing such an important post.
Very good article Jhilmil, I read every word of it. Sharing this in my group to other parents to get cues from these tips.
Thanks Nidhi!
These are some great tips for child so that they can learn to manage thier Emmotionally properly and of course they will do great in thier life Because of this.
All the points are well though of and valid for all the kids. Being emotionally well equipped is equally as important as physical health.
Absolutely agree with you…a child must be nurtured and be strong emotionally.
Wonderful post with useful tips.
Agree with you , we need to encourage them and at the same time leave them a little to handle things themselves.
It’s very important to guide kids the right way …they learñ while they have fun so we need to teach them fun ways…taking failure and perseverance is very essential to teach..
This is such a beautifully written post. I read it along with my husband. Problem solving is a part we need to work on more. We have been reachingbiut son how to solve a puzzle instead of giving him an approach to work on. Thanks Jhilmil for such amazing parenting content.
True Akanksha, kids just need a small direction and we all learn it by experience. Thanks for commenting:)
These are some important points that you have discussed here. I see a lot of parents doing everything for their children right from projects to pick and drop. They just don’t realize they are doing more harm than good.
Oh yeah, that is why kids are unaware of how to be mentally and emotionally strong as they never face any situation themselves
This is very important task to teach their kids how to deal with emotion. Agree with you that Proper source of Nutrition plays vital role in kids brain development
Managing kids emotions is really a challenge but yeah you pointed out great points which we can take care and go ahead with smooth parenting
It is really difficult to manage kid’s emotions . but your tips are very helpful in this case. Allow them to face failure and no to perfectionism is the best tips among all.
These are the very strong point which you have shared. I love the way you have written. Enfagrow A+ have all the nutritional substance. Will definitely share this product details with my cousin who is a new mom now. Thank you for sharing this post.
Wow I had no idea about this product and its seems like I must try it out soon. Thank you for sharing the information and review of the product along with your informative post.
Such a important and sensitive subject. The must read article for parents. I too think emotion management too is important for the kids to be a better person.
Loved the post and I will say it is the ideal scenario one would want. The big question is do we all are at all point in time, able to do all these?
Cheers!!
UK`